A meeting of sad and unfortunate events left headteacher Sian Lacey and her family relying on the local food bank. Here, Sian talks to Dorothy Lepkowska about how the ASCL Benevolent Fund has been a lifeline for her and her family ever since.

Lifesaving support

At 43 and a secondary headteacher in Portsmouth, Sian had given birth to a daughter who was very poorly as an infant. Within a short time, her husband Andy – also a teacher – became desperately ill with a spinal problem forcing him to give up work and submit to treatment and operations. The couple’s two sons were at university. 

“It was a very difficult time, because neither of us could work. It was incredibly stressful,” Sian said. “My husband had already taken extended leave from his job so he could be a stay-at-home father to enable me to continue as a headteacher. But he was able neither to work nor to look after our daughter, as he couldn’t walk and needed spinal surgery. And he received no sick pay as he had already left his job. 

“In the circumstances, I couldn’t continue being a head as I needed to be a full-time carer, both for him and our daughter.” 

Difficult times 

As time wore on, the family began to slip further and further into difficulty. 

“We struggled on for probably about a year, using our savings and the food bank,” Sian said. “I felt so despondent queuing at a food bank with a 10-month-old baby. It was a low moment in my life. 

“I was doing work when I could, cleaning people’s houses and selling children’s clothes – anything I could think of, really, to try to bring in some money. But in any event, none of it was enough to cover our outgoings. 

“Then Covid hit, and our sons came home so there were a lot of us in the house to feed and take care of.” 

The family’s bad luck did not just relate to illness. Prior to having her baby, Sian had moved to a new school in a different local authority, which meant that benefits such as maternity leave had had to be renegotiated. 

In the end, she had no option but to resign from her post. She was also studying for a master’s degree in social care, which she hoped would ultimately help her to gain a headship in a special needs school. Completing this was now in doubt when she had so many other priorities. 

“I suppose I should have read my contract more thoroughly and, in the end, I didn’t have much choice but to leave,” she said. “It wasn’t fair on the school, or the staff and pupils, for me to remain, as they all needed stability. Professionally, it was a heart-breaking decision as I had worked so hard to get that first headship. 

“I hadn’t expected to get pregnant at 43 and, with my daughter’s and husband’s illnesses, everything just happened all at once. It was overwhelming. But that’s life and you can’t predict what’s going to happen.” 

A friend for life 

It was while Sian was at her lowest that she confided in a friend and colleague, who advised her to approach ASCL, her union. A couple of days after the initial approach, Sian received a call back from colleagues at the union’s Benevolent Fund. 

“I was very nervous making that first call, and it felt like a really big deal to ring up and say ‘hey, I need help, please’,” she said. “I’m not that sort of person and have always managed. 

“But I was put in touch with a lovely lady called Lesley, who helped me in every way possible – financially, practically and emotionally.” 

The Benevolent Fund provided the family with much-needed financial assistance for everyday essentials such as food. Assistance was also provided to enable Sian to continue, and complete, her master’s degree. 

“I was on an education journey of my own when all of this happened and was doing a master’s so that I could qualify as a social worker and therefore look at pupils and their families in the round,” she said. 

“The intention was to help me get a job in special needs. Gaining this qualification was what saved my career, as I am now the head of a special school. I worked as a social worker for a year in children’s care before going back to a school as a supply teacher and then gaining my current headship.” 

Sian said the help she received from the Benevolent Fund, and Lesley, who until her retirement in May, was ASCL Benevolent Fund Chair and Trustee, literally saved her family from disaster. 

She added: “It is no exaggeration to say that it was life-saving and gave us back our future. The financial help offered us some breathing space to get back on our feet. Without it, I dread to think how things might have turned out. We would almost certainly have lost our home, and I certainly wouldn’t be where I am now as the headteacher of a special school. 

“Lesley was a massive emotional support to me in so many ways. I was able to call her and offload all my feelings. She kept me moving forward and thinking positively, telling me that things would get better and that I would get back to where I had been as a headteacher. 

“She helped me to focus on what I needed to do when everything seemed so hopeless. And if I asked her advice about something, and she didn’t immediately know the answer, she would go and find out before coming back to me. 

“At the time there were endless hospital appointments with my daughter at Great Ormond Street and then Alder Hey hospitals. It meant that I could concentrate on family matters and her knowledge and advice made everything so much less overwhelming. 

“Lesley was an absolute rock, and we still keep in touch now.” 

It is no exaggeration to say that it was life-saving and gave us back our future. The financial help offered us some breathing space to get back on our feet. Without it, I dread to think how things might have turned out. 

Sian Lacey 

ASCL Benevolent Fund 

The ASCL Benevolent Fund provides protection and care for all members, past and present, and their dependants. If you know someone who may benefit from the fund or if you think you would benefit yourself, please call 0116 299 1122 or visit www.ascl.org.uk/benevolentfund 

Dorothy Lepkowska
Freelance Education Writer
@dotlepkowska.bsky.social

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